joke time

[Gadjett]

At dawn the telephone rings, "Hello, Senor Rod? This is Ernesto, the caretaker at your country house."

"Ah yes, Ernesto. What can I do for you? Is there a problem?"

"Um, I'm just calling to advise you, Senor Rod, that your parrot, he is dead."

"My parrot? Dead? The one that won the international competition?"

"Si, Senor. That's the one."

"Damn. That's a pity. I spent a small fortune on that bird. What did he die from?"

"From eating the rotten meat, Senor."

"Rotten meat? Who the hell fed him rotten meat?"

"Nobody Senor. He ate the meat of the dead horse."

"Dead horse? What dead horse?"

"The thoroughbred, Senor Rod."

"My prize thoroughbred is dead?"

"Yes, Senor Rod, he died from all that work pulling the water cart."

"Are you insane? What water cart?"

"The one we used to put out the fire, Senor."

"Good Lord! What fire are you talking about man?"

"The one at your house Senor, A candle fell and the curtains caught on fire."

"What the hell? Are you saying that my mansion is destroyed because of a candle?"

"Yes, Senor Rod."

"But there's electricity at the house! What was the candle for?

"For the funeral, Senor Rod."

"WHAT BLOODY FUNERAL?"

"Your wife's, Senor Rod. She showed up very late one night and I thought she was a thief, so I hit her with your new Tayler Made Super Quad 460 golf club."

Silence. LONG silence.

"Ernesto, if you broke that driver, you're in deep s---!!"



Little Bruce and Jenny are only 10 years old, but they are in love and want to get married.

Bruce goes to Jenny's father to ask for her hand.

Thinking this is too darned cute, Mr. Smith replies, "Bruce, you are only 10. Where will you two live?"

"In Jenny's room," says Bruce. "It's bigger than mine and we can both fit there nicely."

"You're not old enough to work," says Mr. Smith, still playing along.

"How will you support Jenny?"

"Our allowances. Jenny gets five bucks, I get 10. That's about $60 a month. Should do us just fine."

How can I stump this young fella, thinks Mr. Smith to himself.

"This is great, Bruce. But what will you do if you two have little ones of your own?"

Bruce shrugs his shoulders. "So far we've been lucky."