Another New Year List

[Laleldil]

Thoughts to ponder for 2007





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Number 10: Life is sexually transmitted.

Number 9: Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.

Number 8: Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich.

Number 7: Give a person a fish and you feed him for a day; teach a person to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks

Number 6: Some people are like a Slinky.....not really good for anything, but you still can't help but smile when you shove them down the stairs.

Number 5: Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing.

Number 4: All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism.

Number 3: Why does a slight tax increase cost you two hundred dollars, but a substantial tax cut saves you thirty cents?

Number 2: In the 60's, people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.


AND THE NUMBER 1 THOUGHT FOR 2007: Happy New Year to all !!!!!

We know exactly where one cow with Mad-cow-disease is located among the millions and millions of cows in America but we haven't got a clue as to where thousands of illegal immigrants and terrorists are located. Maybe we should put the Department of Agriculture in charge of immigration.

[Jvarin]

Number 8: Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich.

Truer words never spoken.

[EggbornHatchedrotten]

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Number 8: Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich.

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What about Sleepy and Bitchy?

[Chitiwok]

Both of those are extensions of one of the other two needs not being met. AKA "I'm tired. I need some sugar/caffeine" or "Hurry up and get over here with that [insert food item or sexual favor]"

[Laleldil]

Think Eggy is confused. This is more a Men's list not women. One other thought that comes to mind, that I assume most mean learn early in a successful marriage.

Always take two aspirins to bed with you at night. 'Not tonight, I've got a headache.', give them to her. Else take them yourself to keep your blood thin.